Add a Word, Ruin a (Pandemic) Book

Inspired by this cartoon, the Bethany House fiction team rewrote a few classic novels to better fit our current season.* Since everyone has extra time on their hands, why not make the literary greats more relevant by one tiny little change to the title? Here’s what we mean…

One Hundred Years of 2020 Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez

A Tale of Two Quarantines by Charles Dickens

Not On the Road by Jack Keroauc

Sense and Sanitation by Jane Austen

Charlotte’s Web Classroom by E. B. White

Alexander and the Terrible, No Good, Very Bad Year by Judith Viorst

Oh, the Places You Won’t Go! By Dr. Seuss

To Kill a Social Life by Harper Lee

The Lord of the Masks by J.R.R. Tolkien

Twenty-Twenty by George Orwell (JUST AS BAD)

But why stop there? Thinking about it, we realized we could update a few Bethany House titles as well.

From a Social Distance by Tamera Alexander

Before I Zoom Called You Mine by Nicole Deese

A Dangerous Cough by Elizabeth Camden

Until the Restrictions Fall by Connilyn Cossette

A Faithful Virtual Gathering by Leslie Gould

Stuck Together (in Quarantine) by Mary Connealy

A Cure Unknown by Roseanna M. White

A Most Inconvenient Mask by Regina Jennings

A Mosaic of Germs by Kimberly Duffy

For Such an Unprecedented Time by Kate Breslin

A Uncommon Skype Courtship by Kristi Ann Hunter

A Conspiracy of Conspiracy Theories by Ronie Kendig

Outbreak by Davis Bunn (wait, that’s actually the real title…)

We hope you’ve enjoyed our little exercise in re-writing books. May all of your reading be healthy and occasionally hilarious!

(*This is all totally tongue-in-cheek and not intended as actual, serious pandemic commentary. Except if your takeaway is that books are great for social distancing, because they are.)

Okay, your turn, readers! Add or change a word to modify a book to make it more COVID-relevant. Then share it in the comments.